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10/27/2010

Halloween Greetings


Trick-or-treat THIS!
 This is how I feel about Halloween.                             ======>



I just heard on the radio that there has never been a documented  case in the USA of anyone poisoning candy or putting sharp objects in apples at Halloween.   The chief hazard to children on Halloween is getting run over by a car as they dart across streets in frenzied search of stale candy.

Yet these urban myths about dangerous dispensers of tainted treats remain lodged in our memories causing parents to spread fear and distrust to yet another generation of whiny, weenie kids.

Maybe every costume should come with a helmet, just to be safe. 

On Halloween, we don't give out stale candy anymore. We shut off the outside lights and go to a nice restaurant.  It is the one night of the year when you can dine in peace without some kid at the next table banging his spoon on his plate (usually while the seemingly deaf parents separately check their individual IPhone or blackberry hoping for some interesting message that might save them from the tedium of polite conversation.)

This year the best venue will be the local sports bar, where we can watch the Patriots massacre the Vikings.
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Update on Oct 28th.  In WSJ today, an article by Lenore Skenazy titled "Stranger Danger and the decline of Halloween" discusses the topic of parental over caution.  I think Ms Skenarzy was the person being interviewed on NPR.  She has wtitten a book called "Free Range Kids."  (I guess her point is that they taste better than the children who are kept in confined pens and fed growth hormones and kibble :-)

2 comments:

George W. Potts said...

I think your pumpkin image was "borrowed" from "Calvin and Hobbs." And your dining out gambit, from Scrooge McDuck. I've placed your name on Craig's List for Definite Tricks. Good luck ...

DEN said...

...Like you wouldn't give a kidney to be able to come with us! Hah!