It is common knowledge that a jobseeker should not waste his time sending unsolicited resumes to the HR department. They do not have the capacity or mission to be proactive about staffing. I reminded myself of this fact yesterday when - in an admitted moment of weakness and desparation - sent an email to the HR dept of a local college (Hillary's alma mater). I thought a human might actually read the incoming emails. Clearly, they rely on an automated text scanner to route incoming mail.
Partial text of what I sent:
Subject: Business Systems Analyst
"Please forward to your Chief Information Officer
I am currently an Independent Contractor who is seeking interesting IT projects. I have campus experience and reside locally. As an experienced business systems analyst, with a background as a functional user/manager and project leader," blah-blah-blah.
This morning I got this reply:
" We appreciate your interest in the employment opportunities at Hillary
College. However, it was noted upon receiving your application that the
position for which you wish to be considered is not amongst the
information you have provided. You may visit our website at
www.hillarycollege.edu/HR/careers to view a listing of all our currently
available positions. Please resubmit your resume and cover letter yo us
with this information and we will be happy to process your application.
We regret any inconveniences and wish you the best of luck on your future
career endeavors.
Sincerely,
Human Resources
Hillary College
---------------------------------------------------------
I replied, quoting their excessive verbiage:
"However, it was noted upon receiving your application that the
position for which you wish to be considered is not amongst the
information you have provided.
Dear HR Dept,
I would have edited this sentence to read:
"We don't actually read incoming mail"
And I would have used a spellchecker.
Thanks for your interest
--------------------------------------------------------------
Shortly afterwards I received this email:
Thank you for applying for a position at Hillary College. For further
information regarding your application, please visit
http://www.hillary.edu/HR/careers/AAsurvey.html
Thank you.
-------------------------------------------------------------
It turns out that the system is designed to accept resumes only for open positions.
I really wouldn't fit in there anyway. So I deleted everything and pretended nothing had ever happened. Which in fact is true. Anybody want to do lunch?
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