Endorsement (in case you were undecided)

The Philadelphia Inquirer endorses Kamala Harris in the critical swing state of Pennsylvania.

"Voters face an easy but tectonic choice in the race for the White House.

Will they choose the first woman or the oldest man to be the next president?

Will they choose the prosecutor or the convict?

Will they choose the candidate who supports restoring Roe v. Wade, or the man who bragged about overturning it?

Will they choose the candidate with a tax plan to help the middle class or the one who wants to help the superrich?

Will they choose the candidate who backs a tough bipartisan immigration law or the guy who killed the measure?

Will they choose the candidate who wants to combat climate change or the one who thinks it is a hoax?

Will they choose the candidate who upholds the peaceful transfer of power or the one who summoned a violent mob to attack the U.S. Capitol?

Will they choose the candidate who stands up to Vladimir Putin or the one who said Russia could do “whatever the hell they want?”

Will they choose the candidate who champions education, health care for all, and sensible gun safety laws, or the person who wants to close the U.S. Department of Education, repeal Obamacare, and told supporters after a school shooting to “get over it?”

Will they choose the candidate who supports the working class or the one who is anti-union and opposed raising the minimum wage?

Will they choose a woman of color who wants to unite the country, or a man with a history of misogynistic, racist, and divisive comments and actions?

Will they choose the candidate who supports LGBTQ rights or the one who wants to roll back protections for the gay community?

Will they choose the candidate who will uphold the presidential oath, or the one who was impeached twice for high crimes and misdemeanors, profited from the White House, dangled pardons to cronies, and was indicted four times?

This baker’s dozen list could go on, but the choice is clear and obvious.

Vice President Kamala Harris wants to help all Americans.

Donald Trump wants to help himself.

That is why The Inquirer endorses Kamala Devi Harris to be the 47th president of the United States.”

The Shit List

 It was another of those warmish Fall days that make you glad to be alive. I was sitting at my desk reading the obituary page in today’s paper. One of my few obsessions in life is the daily reading of death notices, hoping to see the names of people who are on my shit list. 

The shit list is not very long. I keep it in my head. The list contains the names of people -- mainly former bosses who failed to appreciate my genius, a few evil and conniving coworkers who betrayed confidences and thwarted my ambitions. The neighbor with the barking dog. The CFO who torpedoed my career back in the 80’s, one of his lackeys who made my job (and me) disappear hoping to get suck-up points. The moron who thought my idea for using the internet for customer service was a dumb and risky idea in 1996. 

The list has not had any new additions in the last few years, mainly since I stopped working for people with their heads up their ass. Unfortunately, I have not crossed too many people off the list either. I heard one of them got testicular cancer (thumbs up!) but sadly, it is not always fatal. 

I am not saying that their crimes are a motive for murder or anything like that. I’m just saying that news of the early and agonizing death of people on the list would cheer me up. A bit of schadenfreude, you say? Hey, I never said I was perfect.

 Actually, now that I think of it, I have a more unspecific list of nameless people whose deaths I would have enjoyed reading about. Call center owners and employees, authors of those scam emails, drivers who have cut me off or otherwise violated my safety and lane occupation on the highways… that sort of offender. 

Today, no one I know was listed in the paper, so I turned to the bird sightings section. One of the sightings was a scarlet ibis. This has to be a secret code. You never see ibises in the North.