Bigotgate?

Poor Gordon Brown, PM of Great Britain, in the pre-election campaign to keep his job. He got caught saying regrettable things on a live mike. He called a the woman to whom he had been chatting a bigot, because she was complaining about the numbers of Eastern European immigrants in the UK taking jobs and using services. They are calling it Bigotgate and saying that it threatens to sink his campaign.

Not that what he said was so awful, but it was said behind her back and not face to face. The political opposition pounced and the news organizations have been delighting in the gaffe, despite the fact that he actually went back to the woman's house and personally apologized.

Poor Brown, all he did was call the woman a bigot. He never mentioned mention the fact that she was also overweight.

Kinda reminds you of the good old USA. Just a few weeks ago, VP Joe Biden famously congratulated Obama on his Health Care bill passage, in front of a live mike. Everyone who doesn’t live in a cave has heard him say grinningly “This is a big fucking deal !” That got everyone's panties in a bunch for a few days, especially the opposition that is obsessed with nitpicking everything that anyone in the Obama administration says or does.

These contemporary examples are not the first incidents where embarrassing things were caught on mike

From Wikipedia:

"On September 4, 2000, when Bush and running mate Dick Cheney appeared at a
campaign event at Naperville, Illinois. While on stage before the event, Bush
said to Cheney, "There's Adam Clymer, major league asshole from the New York
Times." Cheney responded, "Oh yeah, he is, big time." The remarks were picked up
by a live microphone, causing a minor campaign controversy. Bush later publicly
stated "I regret that a private comment I made to the vice presidential
candidate made it through the public airways. I regret everybody heard what I
said."

When this Ronald Reagan sound bite was leaked in 1984, I got under my desk

"My fellow Americans, I'm pleased to tell you today that I've
signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five
minutes."

It was a warm-up joke, and only the audio techs heard it live, before the radio speech was broadcast; but within a few hours it leaked out and most of Asia went on alert. Old Dutch really had a decent sense of dark humor.


I really can't say whether Brown is worthy of being re-elected to the PM post, but if I was a Brit, I would look at his record and pay less attention to an utterance that was accidentally recorded.
And that fat bigot, well, maybe she needs a course in diversity training...

Rethinking the Overhead Fee Thing

In the WSJ today there was a piece in the Personal Journal section titled "What's Behind New Baggage Fees." Middle Seat columnist Scott McCartney does a nice job explicating the thinking behind the Spirit Airlines plan to charge for carry-on luggage.

In short, Spirit claims that they charge less than competitors for the basic ticket, so they feel justified in charging those passengers who use "extra services" such as storing carry-on luggage in limited overhead bins - higher fees than the rate for normal checked baggage. Yes, you heard that correctly: checked baggage will cost less than carry-on.

If you have been in an airplane during the past year, you know what a nightmare it has been. Every flight I have been on was overbooked. The gate personnel do not enforce the boarding plan, so if you follow the rules, by the time you get to your seat in 11B there is no overhead space available anywhere near your row. People who formerly checked their bags are now stuffing them into overhead bins.

Flying is akin to torture. Cruel and unusual punishment for wanting to be somewhere where the ocean water is warm.

I think that airline executives must have the cruelest hearts of any industry leaders. The braniacs at Spirit have installed no-recline seats in their new Airbus A320s. Ah good! you think, but no, they didn't do it for your comfort (so you would not have somebody's dreadlocks in your face for 4 hours). No! they did it so they could squeeze an extra 20 seats into the sardine can.

They say they will not back off the fee, despite the bad press, and the promise from major carriers not to follow suit. Spirit claims the new pricing policy will reduce gate delay. Which should make everyone happy. Especially the sardines that are packed-in nose to tail.

I have asserted that the real problem with airline ticket pricing is the failure to establish a set price for a basic seat. It should be based on some percentage of the fixed cost to take the plane from point A to point B. Right now it is a veritable auction where affluent travelers can outbid the cost-sensitive rabble for prime seats (at prime time).

I would like to see a standard fare (as they have on public transportation or a movie theater). I have no problem with the air carrier exercising their discretion to charge fees. As long as everyone is paying the same fees for the same service.
The free market will place the cap on charges, as long as the government sticks to regulating public safety and security. I am planning to stay home for a while and see what happens.

5 Oclock Update

As if by magic it's Fixed now. Never mind.

You Can't Fix Stupid

Hello, Verizon.net Here's your survey. You Suck! Because if someone had sent email to my Verizon.net account in the past three days, it was not delivered to me. I just get a mindless set of error messages telling me that my password is wrong.

When I called the help line, some guy located in Bangladesh informs me in the most oblique English that "We are having issues with that server, which leads to you having issues accessing your email." Well, thanks but how about fixing the problem?

When I tried the online help desk, I get a message that the server is scheduled to be repaired 3pm today (probably pacific time zone).

If I wanted customers to think I was a reliable player in the email world, I would not have let a server remain out of service for three days. I would have Americans answering the helpdesk calls/emails from users in the USA.

They talk about businesses that are "too big to fail." Verizon is one of those companies that fails because it is too big. They mashed together a phone company an internet service provider and a TV service, but the only thing integrated is the billing. They suck when you have a problem. Getting a human being always requires a minimum twenty minute wait.

It's just stupid.

If I had a critical business need for the information I would have switched to another service provider. I may do that anyhow anyhow....
Here is your survey, Verizon.
Here is your sign...

The Problem With Diversity

Before I forget this, I wanted to mention and article I read a few weeks ago (March 8th) in the Ideas Section of the Boston Sunday Globe on the topic of bias and diversity. The article by Drake Bennett reported that recent research studies have been unable to demonstrate that the ubiquitous diversity training programs have resulted in significant positive changes. They measured headcount and promotions at major corporations where such programs have been de rigueur for the past decade or so, and the results were, well, unexpected. They were the same as in places that did not have such programs.

I think the reason for this is simple: No one can make a compelling argument that more diversity results in a more profitable company. Or a better basketball team.

In the same section a Globe editorial cited the staffing at Wheelock College in Boston for their high "participation" rates of black and Hispanic employees. One might gather from this emphasis that the definition of "diversity effectiveness" is hiring more minorities and women into "good" jobs and paying them the same as white males.

In other words, diversity training is perceived as having pretty much the same goals as affirmative action. Many managers see affirmative action as an artificial device to lower standards to allow less qualified applicants to have hiring preference. (If you have been in conversation with a customer service agent who can barely speak English, you can appreciate how ineffective some of these program can be.)

The discussion seems to revolve around race and gender. We don't hear so much about other aspects of true diversity - age, disability, nationality? Moreover there seems to be a widening gulf between economic classes. People - especially older people - seem to be most comfortable around people who are compatible educationally and economically. I think discrimination in 2010 may have less to do with skin color than it does with social values (at least in the Northeast). People who can afford it are choosing to live in communities where The Association dictates the color of your house and the credit score - not the skin color- of your neighbors. Racial intolerance like public smoking has become unacceptable.

Political polarization has become the dominant divisive force in our culture to an extent never seen before (at least by me). In the old days, you would invite people of different views to stimulate interesting dinner conversation. Nowadays, we segregate our dinner guests by their political beliefs to avoid shouting matches and other hostilities.

I mention it because this is an area where race clearly matters less than ideology. Many on the Left decry the Tea Party rank and file as ignorant racists, partially because the membership is predominantly white. But this does not accurately describe the motivation for Tea Party activists - which is principally economic.

The Diversity movement gained its broadest acceptance during the boom years. The crisis of double digit unemployment over the past two years has probably changed the landscape. It will be interesting to see if struggling companies meet their stated diversity objectives as they rebuild their decimated workforce.

I would not be surprised to see American businesses start to move away from "diversity" as a goal, since it has no real business value, other than to assuage the guilt of those who feel that they have been the fortunate beneficiaries of a good genetic dice roll. When the central purpose of a business is profit, talent will almost always trump bias. (Note the qualification "almost always" because the Hobbesean truth is - some people are just nasty, brutish and short. )

Marathon/Patriots Day 2010

Today is the running of the thin people - The Boston Marathon.
Thousands of total strangers run through the fabulous streets of our town on their way to the finish line about 12 miles up the road.

I have long been a supporter of my proposal to charge runners a toll - one dollar each - to help defray the cost of clean-up, crowd control - and to compensate local citizens for the inconvenience and potential danger to citizens who may need medical attention as well as those who have run out of beer.


One elite runner #104 liked it so much that he pulled up a chair to watch.
(Ok, actually he sprained his knee and had to stop and rest.)

The watchers, and their inevitible dogs stand on the sidewalk cheering the runners on.

Some fans of this blog were there:

Hey, Larry and Kathy, Smile you're on Hellhole Camera!

Unexpected Consequences

As previously mentioned, my wife and I were forced to cancel our long-planned getaway to Florida last week because of an unscheduled series of extreme weather events - events that the insurance companies like to call "Acts of God".

So I feel empathy for the million or so people who have already had their travel plans disrupted or (more likely) ruined because of the volcano eruption in Iceland. The ash plume from that erupting hell-hole consists of fine pieces of rock and glass that can shut-down a jet engine and etch a windshield and make it useless. The plume is affecting many European airports and some scientists are predicting a cold summer as the volcanic dust in the stratosphere blocks the sunlight. (Drat! Another factor that will undoubtedly impact my tomato harvest in August.)


It's bad enough to be forced to stay at home, unable to start your trip, but consider the agony of being stranded at Heathrow or DeGaul airport, waiting for a flight back to the states. The hassle of getting re-booked on future flights is overwhelming because those flights are already fully booked by millions of other Spring travelers who are returning from their vacations. The horror stories of travelers who cannot get here from there evoke a sense of dread.

The old saying that the gods laugh at our plans seems apt.
And, if you weren't already annoyed enough by the vulnerability factor, physical discomfort and cost of air travel, the next trend in passenger gouging should send you over the edge. is to charge you for your carry-on luggage. Huh? Not checked baggage but carry-on! Up to $40.
Spirit Airlines has announced that they will charge up to $45 per carry-on if you book after August 1, 2010. Public outrage is building. Several congressmen have rushed opportunistically to the microphones to announce bills that would ban such fees by airlines. In one case, Sen. Charles Schumer sees an opportunity to raise taxes on the airline by charging an excise tax on fees. Hey Chuck, excise taxes are paid by customers. Instead of penalizing the Airline, Shumer's bill would add to the cost of the fee. What a dolt!

I hate being nickel and dimed as much as anyone, but I can see a valid argument in charging for services used. If I don't check a bag, Maybe I should get a discount. If I don't need a lot of legroom, maybe I should pay less than the fat and tall folk. Itemizing these costs seems sensible. The problem is that there is no list or set price for a seat on an airplane. The airline executive goniffs adjust the basic price based on what they think the market will bear.

Some thing ought to be done, but I do not think the government making laws about what the airlines can charge for. This is not the role government should be playing. The government needs to worry about safety and security. Let the customers show the airlines what they are willing to bear in terms of fees and charges.

Spirit Airlines is taking a lot of criticism for their over-the-line announcement. Most of the major airlines are vowing that they will not follow suit. Something tells me that the carry-on fee will go away and fast. Ironically the Spirit ads will then say "See, we listen!"

The Dragon in my Basement

This morning, my wife admitted that she was responsible for the recent flood in our basement.

"I should have known better," She said.

"What?"

"The Dragon. I put him down in the basement on the elfa shelving, near the cat box. I thought it might help prevent, you know, accidents."

Of course, she was referring to the priceless dragon vase that had been handed-down through countless generations of her family.
Perhaps some long-dead forebear had found the treasure during an archaeological dig on a perilous trip to some ancient Chinese city. Then, sometime after the establishment of electrical power, some artless utilitarian had drilled a hole in the bottom and turned it into a lamp, a fact which actually made it just about worthless (another way of saying priceless, n'est ce pas?). Or maybe her mother bought it at Walmart. We'll probably never know.
A few months ago, my wife decided that she preferred it as an ornament as opposed to light source, and so she had restored it to its natural power. To the superstitious, the emblem - a coiled dragon - represents a potent symbol which is capable of warding-off unlucky and evil spirits. In case you have not been paying attention, you should know that your life is ruled by Feng Shui (pronounced fung shway).

If your wife believes in Feng Shui, you might as well believe in it too, because since she rules your life, you are stuck living in a house that is arranged with mirrors facing specific directions and dragons watching over you.

My wife realized the error of placing a dragon in the basement after perusing her dog-eared copy of Feng Shui Room by Room. Not only was the dragon annoyed at being placed on a shelf near the litter box in the cellar, but he was facing outward (to ward-off evil spirits from the street). Two no-no's.

"The dragon must face inward," she said, as if quoting some rule. "But, not to worry. He is now upstairs and facing the right way. Everything will be OK now."

Somehow I was not much comforted, noting that the forecast was for three more days of rain.

She looked at me and smiled.

"It's not raining rain you know, it's raining violets..."

I went down to the cellar to check my pumps. Floor dry. Electricity on. Pumps pumping.

When I came back upstairs she remarked that I appeared to be calmer. My brow, which had become sore from frowning about the water, seemed less tense. I shrugged.

"See, it's working. The curse is lifted."

"Yeah, we'll see" I muttered as I went out to take another load of soggy paper and ruined furniture to the dump. Standing by the van, I had to squint at the abrupt break in the clouds and the bright sun fighting its way through the mist.

Unconsciously, I began looking for a bluebird, and listening for its song.

Apologia

Despite my vow never to carry ads on my Blog, I have caved -in. My daughter urged me to do this because she belives that someone will send me money if enough people click on ads that interest them. As one who has been critical of rampant advertising, I feel a bit like a prostitute.

Comparison Therapy

Is there anything more stressful than seeing water gushing into your basement? If you had asked me this question a few days ago, I might have said "Hell no!" But that was then. Today I think everything is relative.

Time and water will do that. Change the priorities in your life.

One of my teachers in high school was wont to intone "All comparisons are invidious." (Come to think of it, that quote is one of the few pieces of wisdom I can recall from my high school education . For some reason the assertion has stayed in my head all these years.) It made complete sense at the time. It seemed to convey a deep understanding about the nature of envy and competition.

These days, I am not so sure about the invidiousness of making comparisons. Hierarchy is all about distinctions, and we cannot escape the hierarchical nature of society, and the fact that we have a "place". The key to contentment is: Instead of obsessing about people who are better-off (and higher-up) than you, it is much more therapeutic to consider one's situation relative to others who are less fortunate. You know like, eat your spinach, they are starving in China. Or, you are complaining about not having shoes; then you meet someone who has no feet(see note 1).


So if you can feel a little better-off than at least one other person, it helps with the stress, right?

On further thought, if I was creating a list of stressful situations, the gushing water would not be so high on the list.

For example: watching your nest egg being depleted by forces you do not understand...that ranks up there on the stress curve. How about nagging rectal itch? Pretty stressful as Capt Hargreaves (Ret.) has informed me. Hell 90% of the world would love to have a house with a basement, and 50% of them don't get enough water to keep the crops irrigated.

So why am I whining about a few thousand gallons of misplaced H2O, and a few ruined LP's that I would never have listened to again?

I am lucky!

Like I say, everything IS relative.
Time and water will do that: wear away at those sharp and brittle edges of fear and logic , until you end-up as a smooth stone of acceptance on a beach called Serenity where you tell yourself, "It could be worse, you could be stuck in Dayton, Ohio." (see note 2)

======================================

Note 1 One time I complained because I had no shoes. Then I met a man who had no feet. So I asked him what he did with his old shoes, since he didn't need them anymore. He just looked at me like I was a cold hearted moron. Hey, How can you have empathy for a guy when you can't walk around in his shoes?

Note 2 - Actually, I have never been to Dayton, but my sister-in-law assures me that this is the last place on Earth anyone would want to live.

Apres le Deluge, Moi

After twenty four days, we still have pumps going in our heroic efforts to keep the ground water from flooding the basement again. Frankly, I am getting too old for this shite.

The DPW water guys came out and looked around and confirmed that it was high ground water and not a broken water main. Ergo, not their problem. Then, on Tuesday, after a few more calls to the DPW, two highway engineers pulled up in the big orange truck. After looking at the water flowing out the pump hoses, one of them asked me,
"Did it flood from the 50 year event or the 500 year event?" He was referring to the terms the weather guys are using to describe about the succession of freakish storms that inundated southern New England over the past weeks. March was the all time wettest month since they started keeping records. The engineers felt that this was indeed a freak event, that the water table will eventually recede, and chances are we will probably not see a recurrence in our lifetime.

Not much consolation there. The flood has not been kind to many of my memories. I am still leafing through the damp file folders that got drenched in the March 15th flood to see what I have lost. Admittedly, most of the paper that was being saved was toss-able. I am unlikely to need copies of old performance reviews, project plans, write-ups and miscellaneous business flotsam.
The performance reviews were full of ego bruising bureaucratic negativism anyhow, written by over-controlling micro-managers whose fanatical fixation on trivial issues (on-time, under budget, happy customers) manifest the their collective judgement that my work was merely "satisfactory." The project plans were being saved for reasons unknown. Not one of my projects came in on time or under budget, and more than one of them were simply abandoned after months of management dithering.
Among the write-ups I had been saving was my recommendation NOT to acquire a software product that management wanted. In my cover memo, I listed the reasons why the software in questions was not appropriate for our business needs (Foremost of which was that we would have to customize every line of code in the system to make it work in our application.) Naive me. All the logic in the world could not overcome the fact that our VP and the Software company's founder had been roommates at college. Ergo, I was over-ruled and the ensuing system project cost zillions and took two years to implement.

I should be at the airport about now, but instead, I am still monitoring the pumps. Our Florida getaway was another casualty of the flood and continued infiltration of water. Very, very reluctantly, we decided to cancel our long-planned trip to Ft Myers/Sarasota. A bunch of us who had been buddies through high school and beyond decided to have a reunion with our wives/significant others. We had not gotten together for over twenty years, and it was a much anticipated event. Since majority of them have retired to Florida, we hold-outs from the North agreed to meet in Ft. Myers/Sanibel area. While we were in the vicinity, we also included a two day visit to family in Sarasota. The trip was planned: Airline tickets, hotel reservations, rental car.
However, the 500 year event seems to have trumped our twenty year event. The friends and family were understanding and we promised to re-schedule the trip. The car and hotel are easily cancelled with no penalty, but the Airline policy on non-refundable tickets is pretty draconian. There is a cancellation charge of $100 per ticket, and voucher credit on the remainder. Fortunately, Jet Blue was very understanding of the flood situation and they agreed to waive the cancellation charge. So, that was one bright ray of sunshine in an otherwise cloudy sky.

Speaking of which, it is starting to rain outside. Thunderstorms are forecast. (He slumps to the floor, groaning, and curls up into a fetal position)

Wet Records

Two weeks since the deluge of mid March and we are under siege again. We got about two inches of rain today and 4 or 5 more are predicted over night. The basement is wet (again) in spots but so far no deep water, and not much to get spoiled this time. My main concern is not losing power or heat again.

The weather guys are saying that this year we will beat the record for the rainiest March since 1952. I find this mildly comforting. If it is a 50 year event, I will not have to waste my remaining days on this earth trying to be ready for the next one.

The rainiest month on record in these parts is August 1955, when two hurricanes hit the Northeast within 5 days. Hurricane Connie dropped about 6 inches of rain and 5 days later it was Diane which left an additional 13 inches of rain. There was massive flooding and scores of storm caused deaths. I was 13 when that storm hit, and I remember everyone got water in the basement, the electricity was off for days due to trees being blown on power lines. I recall playing Monopoly and Scrabble with my siblings by candlelight drinking warm coke and eating popcorn (the gas stayed on, so you could still cook).

Speaking of records, my old collection of LP's were underwater during the deluge and the covers are destroyed. I decided to toss them since I haven't played on in about 5 years and do not even have a working record player anymore since digital CD's replaced the vinyl. Still, I liked having them and looking at the covers from time to time. Good memories gone to the landfill to be forgotten again.
We shall not see their like again.

Water Woes - Continuing Saga

Mother Nature curse you! We had to cancel our St Patty's Day plans to mop-up. My version of the wearin of the green was my flood/fishing outfit.

It's been 4 days since the rain stopped, and groundwater is still welling-up in the basement. I have 2 pumps going to try to stay ahead of the subterranean tide.

Starting to dry-out a bit, but the clean-up will take many days (and many trips to the dump).

People have been helpful. Thanks to the Fire Dept for loaning me an industrial strength pump to get rid of most of the water. Thanks also to my water savvy friend who loaned me the 2 pumps I am running now. One neighbor stopped by yesterday with two big fans and a nice bottle of Chardonnay.

Perhaps she was impressed by the sight of me in my hip waders.

We got the heat back on yesterday, but still no hot water.

Hoping to see a plumber today...

The Weight of Water

In the play Julius Caesar, there is a minor character known as the soothsayer who walks through a scene or two before the (Spoiler alert) brutal stabbing of the Emperor, shouting "Beware the Ides of March."

I wish somebody had warned me that Mother nature would be stabbing me in the back, on the 15th. I might have been better prepared for the deluge. Then, again, like Caesar, I might have regarded the matter as fated by the gods. I'm picturing the musical version with Caesar singing "Que sera sera"in the first act.

After 23 years in this house without a significant water event, the torrential rains of March 12th, 13th and 14th added to an already saturated terra firma (or should we say terra squishy) and a higher than normal water table. By the morning of the 15th we had at least 6 inches of water in the basement. Everything below that height was drenched. Rugs, luggage, pictures, records (both paper and vinyl), books, cardboard boxes full of treasures. The interesting thing about cardboard is that it loses it's rigidity when it gets wet, so if you had stuff piled on top of a cardboard box, that stuff was likely to end-up in the water. Another thing I would not have predicted: if you pile stuff on top of a plastic bin, and the bin becomes buoyant, it will become top heavy and dump the stuff into the water. The same principle applies to a paper shredder.

The only amusing sight that morning was watching the cat try to use a floating litter box. Ok, not really that funny. The litter stayed dry but the cat got really wet. I hope he was not too traumatized.

Fearing the worst, we shut everything down that had a motor. This included the gas heating system and the downstairs refrigerator. The water extinguished the pilot light in the water heater (on Monday) and we have had no hot water since then. My wife went to our daughter's for her shower today. I believe an icy shower builds character. Plus, I notice that it takes much less time for a cold shower.

Did you know that unless you have specific flood insurance, your normal homeowners policy does not cover damage from rising waters?

As far as I can tell, we are the only house with a flooded basement in our neighborhood. Our nice flat lot seems to be a perfect storm drain. My wife blames it on all the building activity upstream - oops I mean: up the hill from us. Possibly, but then again we haven't had 8-10 inches of rain fall in such a short time for the past 20 odd years. So, maybe the perfect storm will never happen again. At least not in our lifetimes.

Despite these (manageable) hardships, we felt somewhat fortunate, compared to the devastating losses you see on the nightly TV news from all manner of catastrophe. Thousands of people got hit much worse in this storm. People with finished basements, people whose toilets have backed up and filled the house with sewage (our flood is from high ground water, not runoff or backups). Down hill from us there are people who live near the Charles River bank, only a few feet above the current river level - which is at flood stage. Their basements must be swimming pools.
We have been luck that the days have been springlike, so the no-heat situation is tolerable. Forecast for today is a balmy 70 degrees. We were fortunate that water never got high enough to short out the electrical system. So we have lights and power to run pumps.

Not being soothsayers, the future is not ours to see, but we remain resolute in our fight against the tides of fate. The stuff that was drenched will be tossed and soon forgotten. The beer refrigerator will dry out and be returned to service. I will bathe again in warm water. We shall overcome.

Back in the Jaws of the Lion

We did not see any sharks during our Florida getaway, except maybe some of the patrons at the Gulfstream race track in Hollywood. No Alligators, no killer whales.

The closest brush with danger was from homo sapiens. While sunsnoozing on the sand, one well-meaning tourist grabbed my leg and started to drag me back into the surf. When I protested he, apologized "Sorry, I thought you were a beached...you know... manatee."

Ok that is an old joke, but I (and some of my fellow beach goers) may possess a strong resemblence to large pale sea mammels.


Now, we are back in the teeth of winter. Going outside is like having a refrigerater gnawing your ears off.


We are back to our pre-vacation retirement mode: We get up late, have breakfast, read the papers, then we go out on errands or meet friends for lunch, come home for nap, watch the TV news, have dinner, watch a favorite program or a Netflix Movie, go to bed.

I know it must sound hard, stressful, and crazy-busy to you Gen-Xers out there, but we love it.

March looms just around the corner. How shall we remember it? Lion or lamb?

Chasing the Sun

The forecast for Key West was not sunny, so we checked out of the Best Western and headed for Miami Beach. Booked a room via Priceline at Sheraton 4 Points in North Beach area. Three stars $200 per night.

Today is mid 80's and sunny most of the time. I am about to hit the ocean for the first time since we came to sunny Florida.

Returning to Boston tomorrow night - hope the sun follows...

More later

It also rises

If you get up early enough in Key West you can see the sun rise on the water. Hence the title of Hemingway's best novel "The Sun Also Rises."

However as all sailers know a Red Sky in the morning may bring an ill wind.

Wasting Away...

3:30 pm 77 degrees Key West. Cold Sierra Nevada. Ocean view. Eat your hearts out, New England.

From Pompano Beach

Dear Fans,
I'm using the computer in the PB library - I only have 3 more minutes on the timer. The weather here during the past ten days has been unseasonably cool. 60's most of the day, colder at night. Good thing we brought long sleeves and long pants.
Food has been scrumptious; many of the drinking establishments serve Sierra Nevada on tap so, no complaints.

Heading down to Key West for a few days. Forecast is for high seventies and sunny. Maybe we will get to go to the beach!

Talk soon,

Signed,
The EPA (Exceptionally Pale American)

Out of Office Message

On Vacation for a few days

Please check the archives if you need a Hellhole Fix, otherwise I should be back soon, tanned, relaxed and ready to resume my job here at the helm of the Hellhole Journal.

I'm feeling a need to rethink the raison d'etre for this blog. In the beginning, it was called Hellhole Update to chronical the experiences and learnings of a typical working guy - a victim of hierarchy and professional management that sought to stifle humor, creativity and above all else, dissent. The intention was to be entertaining more than informative.

Then, a few years ago, I retired, sort-of. Since I have been out of (Escaped...) the workforce, I've lost the passion about work topics. After all, how many different ways can you say that management is generally clueless, nasty, brutish and short?

In the past year I have drifted into political issues. There has been no dearth of events and points of view worthy of derision and mockery. Yet, I have become weary of politics. It is clear that no amount of discussion will alter anyone's position, and that is just a sad state of affairs, and not entertaining.

So it is. I have come to a journalistic crossroads, he wrote dramatically

I need a new topic.

Any Ideas?

Jumping Ugly on Obama

On Tuesday WSJ printed an OP-ED piece,  "The Obama Spell is Broken" by Fouad Ajami. The author is a senior fellow at Stanford University Hoover Institution - a  Republican leaning Small Government Think Tank. I mention the author's credentials because this piece reveals how utterly wrong a fancy pants intellectual can be when his research is colored by his preconceptions.

"The curtain has come down on what can best be described as a brief un-American

   moment in our history. That moment began in the fall of 2008, with the great financial

   panic, and gave rise to the Barack Obama phenomenon. 

  The nation's faith in institutions and time-honored ways had cracked. In a little-known

   senator from Illinois millions of Americans came to see a savior who would deliver the

   nation out of its troubles. ..."

Ajami seems to forget that the reason for Obama's election.  A lot of voters felt like we needed a drastic change in 2008.  There was a huge shift of independent voters who had voted for Bush in 2004 but who became alienated by the Bush administration's arrogant excesses in the name of the 'war on terror' -  which had badly damaged US credibility around the world. 
Voters were further driven away from the republican party by the failure of the "small government" party to keep the government small and instead of tax and spend, they were cut-tax and spend.  Added to that was the palpable weakness of the McCain-Palin ticket.  Then came the stunning collapse of the financial sector, widespread job loss, and the clear indictment against unregulated free markets.   Compared to the alternative, Obama seemed to the majority like "not such a bad guy". 
To those who see Obama as a Socialist and therefore a threat, his popularity is explained by his appeal to the leftmost of lefties.  But that position ignores the fact the independents are the biggest chunk of voters, and neither Bush nor Obama could have won if their support lay only among ideologues.  It may have seemed to his opponents that Obama was protected by some magic spell.  There were furious and unrelenting  efforts to smear him (via associations) as a Socialist bomb throwing sympathizer and Black Nationalist - even questioning his citizenship.   To their chagrin, only the conservative choir seemed to resonate with this negative nattering. 

When Obama won the big election decisively, and delivered a supermajority to his party,  the opposition  -  failing once again to understand that most of the people who actually show up to vote might actually be thoughtful and deliberative -  wrote off the President's popularity to charisma, magic, mystique. 

Progressives pressed for a draconian attack on the workings of our health care, and on the broader balance between the state and the marketplace. The economic stimulus, ObamaCare, the large deficits, the bailout package for the automobile industry—these, and so much more, were nothing short of a fundamental assault on the givens of the American social compact.

I don't think most voters were tuned-in to the same things that conservatives worry about  about all the time.  Sure, people want security, but some of us are not convinced that the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq are making the US more secure.  Most people don't feel that the mistakes that have been made over the past year were intentional assaults on the American social compact. 

The vast majority of people are mainly concerned with their jobs.  Moreover, they understand that there is little that the government can do in the short term to "create jobs" in the private sector.  Voters are unhappy that the unfettered free market doesn't work.  Most people don't think tax cuts for the wealthy will generate more jobs either. 


Ajami projects his idea of Obama as Icarus; he  has over-reached and has flown too close to the sun

And then there was the hubris of the man at the helm: He was everywhere, and pronounced on matters large and small. This was political death by the teleprompter.

In effect, Ajami (and others) are declaring that Obama has "jumped the shark". This phrase is used to declare the clear turning point where a sitcom or celebrity has lost it's popularity and has started sliding downhill.  

I think they may be jumping the gun.  The shot across the bow sent by Massachusetts was a warning shot, to be sure.   To the amazement of everybody, it changed everything.  It stopped the bloated shipwreck of a healthcare plan dead in the water.  But it does not necessarily sink Obama.

 Deliberative minds might see the election of a Republican to the "Ted Kennedy" seat as a statement about status quo, not so much about Obama.  The conservative claque has been unrelenting in their criticism of every word and gesture of the new president.  But many of those who have expressed disappointment with his results have maintained a positive view of the man.  Much of the criticism is leveled at the leadership of the partisan congress who have botched the public trust.

Obama has 3 more years to get things right.  News of his demise may be premature.

Ask Someone ...

For years, the Toyota tag line has been "Ask some one who owns one."


Today, maybe you should ask someone who owns a late model Camry- as soon as they get out of the hospital.

Ironies - continued

So The Kennedy Senate seat went to Scott Brown the independent Republican, much to the shock and awe of a lot of people who thought the Democratic candidate ("Marsha" Coakley) was a shoe-in.

Here is an interesting tidbit:
Prior to 2004, the succession law provided for the governor to appoint a replacement to a vacant senatorial seat. This appointee would serve as Senator until the next regular election cycle.

When John Kerry became the Democratic nominee for President in 2004, Massachusetts Democrats, who dominated the state legislature, were urged by none other than Ted Kennedy, to change the succession law, just in case Kerry won in the big election. So, they rushed a bill into law that eliminated the power of the Governor (who so happened to be a Republican, Mitt Romney) to appoint a replacement. The new law ensured that the seat would remain vacant until a special election could be held to choose a (presumably Democratic) successor.

Fast forward to five years later. When it became clear that ailing Senator Ted would not survive to the end of his term, he once again sought to change the law. As a strategic move to maintain the supermajority in the Senate, Ted wrote to the Massachusetts leadership, this time urging them to pass a law that provided for the Governor (Democrat Deval Patrick) to name a successor until the special election could be arranged. Even jaded observers such as your humble scribe were shaking our heads at this blatant example of cynical power politics.

But, they messed up.

If they had simply repealed the 2004 change, Gov Patrick would have appointed party loyalist who would have served until the next regular election in 2012. But they left the special election provision intact, which was a mistake as it turned out..
Into that special election rode Scott Brown in his GMC pick-up truck, fueled with independent voter outrage at the workings of political hacks both in the state and in Washington. Hope collided with anger and hope lost.

There will be plenty of analyses offered as to why Scott Brown won the special election. But the irony of this story is this: the guy ultimately responsible for losing the Kennedy seat was - Ted Kennedy!
Furthermore, the initial change turned out to be unnecessary, since Kerry didn't get elected President.

You may be Right

As the great philosopher Billy Joel said, "You may be right, I may be crazy, but it just might be a lunatic you're looking for..."

It is interesting to see all the reactions to the Scott Brown victory over Martha Coakley on Tuesday. Some disappointed Democrats are pouncing on Ms Coakley for her supposed failures. Elsewhere, Starry eyed Liberals are ranting on their Facebook pages that the Massachusetts Redneck truck drivers voted against homeless orphans getting health care coverage. (I guess these were the same Rednecks who voted for Deval Patrick and Barack Obama). Local Conservative talk show hosts are gloating and taking credit for mobilizing their listeners to produce the sudden last minute surge for Brown.

Of all the analyses, I think Brown himself nailed the reason for his victory: People are fed-up with the status quo. So fed-up that they were willing to vote for a guy that most of us would label Conservative. I say most of us, because my favorite Conservative (George) worries that Brown might be a RINO (Republican in name only).
Another example of how we tend to see what we want to see?

My vote for Brown was directed at the current health care bill, which he has promised to vote against. I am not opposed to health care reform, I am against this "train wreck" of a plan, which would immediately increase the cost of health insurance for most working families an added 15-20% and give them less choice and less access. Not mention that NO one would get ANY benefit from this plan until 2014 for Crissakes!

I think we can do better. I am hoping that sending Mr Brown to D.C. as the messenger will help the Dems get rid of the special deals that have been written into the bill and focus on providing healthcare coverage to people who can't afford it.

By breaking the super majority in the Senate, Brown's election could serve the country well. Instead of maintaining a polarized status quo The Dems will have to seek common ground with Repubs to get anything done.

Maybe it's a little starry-eyed of me, but I'm hoping that the threat of getting thrown out of office will make our elected reps pay more attention to the voters and less attention to the special interests. Yeah, I know, You may be right...

But, the beauty of this vote is this: If we made a mistake, we can fix it in 2 years, when Brown comes up for election again.

Doing the Right Thing

Most of the staff here at the Hellhole Journal have been outraged at the sneaky deals and outright cynical payoffs that seem to be accepted as "business as usual" by US Politicians.
It is distressing to hear Harry Reid say the "by definition legislating is about making deals." (I always thought that by definition, legislating was about making LAWS). Apparently I am not alone.
The other day Ben Nelson senator from Nebraska (who has been getting serious flak from just about everyone in and out of Nebraska) has written a letter asking Reid to remove the "cornhusker kickback" clause from the final bill. Now, after watching his personal approval ratings sink like a whale turd, he says, he believes the tax exemption should apply to all states.

This is encouraging news that someone may be listening to the chorus of boos coming from the customers of this "sausage factory." Now we need to hear from the Unions, Louisiana, Vermont and all those other porkers. (BTW this includes the separate outrageous pork barrel deal that our own John Kerry strongarmed through committee to get a contract for GE to manufacture an jet engine that the Pentagon doesn't want. ) We have to acknowledge that these things cost tax money which we do not have.

I probably need to reiterate that me and the staff are not against health care reform. We think that there are plenty of areas where something positive can be done to help people who want and need it. We just don't want the bloated piece of crap that they are fighting for in congress.

For example, we have changed our position on chronic illness. I confess that I was a bit tin-eared about this issue myself, until I had a discussion with a friend who has been losing mobility because of MS. He recently got laid off and may face the daunting challenge of getting affordable health care coverage in the future. I've always realized that no one except the very wealthy can afford to be chronically ill, but I never actually had to confront the situation with a family member or friend before. While I still defend the business decision of an insurance company to decide who they insure (i.e., they should not be forced to lose money), there is a need to cover people with pre-existing conditions. And, that by definition is the role of government. There are plenty of programs that could be cut to allow the funding of care for people with chronic illness - that would indeed be health care reform!

Surf's Up in Massachusetts

So this morning I read that President Obama is going to come to Massachusetts to promote his candidate (current state attorney general, Martha Coakley) in next Tuesday's special election to fill Ted Kennedy's seat. The dems have been confident the the majority of voters who showed up on election day would vote for a guaranteed 60th democratic vote for healthcare reform and other party line votes.

But, not so fast, says Scott Brown, the republican state senator who opposes Ms. Coakley. Brown has tuned-in to the dissatisfaction many independents have expressed about the current health care bill and the sleazy deals that have been made to ram the plan down the throats of the electorate. The dems have demonstrated chronic tone deafness by dismissing any criticism of its plans as partisan rhetoric.

Following their debate last week Coakley saw her lead in opinion polls going downhill like an outgoing tide. Brown's strong performance in the debate and sharp rise in polls elicited national attention with editorials in WSJ and other non regional media. Coakley's campaign hit back with an expensive attack ad campaign. As a non-partisan, my opinion is that Coakley's ads will backlash against her, because the attempts to distort Mr Brown's record and position are obvious.

The tsunami of support for Brown is palpable here. It is a wave of discontent with politics as usual. It should not be seen as pro-republican either. It is a cry of "We're mad as hell, and we're not going to take it anymore."

Now, Mr. Obama is in a bit of a pickle. If Coakley loses the election, Brown has already stated that he will vote to block the current bloated health care plan. "We need to go back and start over," he says. So, Obama cannot ignore the situation because his loyalists (and all those who have sold their souls for the current plan) will blame him if he does nothing and Brown wins. Yet, if he comes here and Brown still wins (shades of New Jersey) Obama will be perceived as weak.

The irony is in the fact that if the healthcare bill is defeated and the dems are forced to go back and rewrite a cleaner, less expensive plan, they will ultimately come out better for it. If the current legislation is passed, the dems will be swept out of power at midterm elections and Obama will be heading back to Chicago in three years.

My advice, stay home Mr. Obama, Our minds are made-up. we taxpayers don't need the cost and hassle of your visit. (Ramp-freeze at Logan, traffic tie-ups to allow his motorcade to cruise at will about our fair city). No matter what the final result on Tuesday, one thing is certain: the tide has turned. And the shockwaves will be felt around the world.

(OK so I mixed up the metaphors. Sue me.)

Cruel Ironies

One cannot adequately describe the appalling devastation that was wrought in Haiti from the earthquake that struck Port-au-Prince. Today's estimates of the death toll is around 50,000. Maybe three million hurt, and/or homeless.

The mind recoils at the magnitude of sorrow. Turn away, it urges us. We grab for the remote, switch to another channel looking for for mindless pap to soothe our abraded synapses

The images echo other places, where "nature" has struck fiercely. I'm thinking of New Orleans after Katrina. Throngs of people dazed and waiting for help - perhaps wondering, if the camera crews can get here why can't we get food and water?

And a few years ago (2004) the Indian Ocean earthquake and resultant tsunami which is reported to have killed 230,000 people in Indonesia, Sri Lanka, Thailand and India. Those images of helpless people being swept into the churning killing surge are unforgettable.

The evening news featured a local man who had just been informed that his daughter who worked in Haiti, was found alive in the rubble of the earthquake. "God is good!" he kept shouting. "they found my daughter."

This seemed ironic to me. How can this man think God is good when tens of thousands of people have been killed, maimed, orphaned - but He is good because He chose to save one man's daughter? What about all the others?

Talk about cruel ironies, this morning it is reported that the saved woman was not his daughter. The Almighty, it seems, was not answering prayers, again.

Heads vs Hearts

The times they are a-changin, goes the old Bob Dylan song. Indeed.

As we roll into a new decade, Americans are basically divided into two groups. The first group sees the world changing for the better. We call these people Progressives. They tend to be naive and hopeful. They view the ever-changing cultural norms with equanimity. They see possibilities, they regard 'having fun' as a worthwhile goal. Fundamentally, they believe that things will work out if we just try to get-along and treat each other decently. They feel superior to the other group because they are driven by compassion to share the wealth (especially the wealth of the rich fat cats) with less-fortunate souls. They regard human laziness and stupidity as an unfortunate result of a bad dice roll. By contrast, if one is lucky enough to be born good looking , healthy and smart enough to take advantage of opportunity, you must always keep in mind that you were not entitled to it; you were given a break and you must pay it forward.


The second group - the ones we call Conservatives - are a grumpy bunch of stick-in-the-muds. They spend their workdays trying to get ahead. Then they stay awake at night afraid of slippery slopes and camels' noses in tents. Cons clearly see the negative aspect of anything that smacks of change. They love traditions and old authoritative books and parchments. They think everything worth knowing was already known by the Founding Fathers; new fads and ideas are regarded with suspicion and skepticism. They don't see the point in having fun, because people hate us and we need to stay on guard. They think they are superior to the other group because they are driven by their heads instead of their hearts. They see most taxation as stealing money from hard working people and giving it to ignorant slackers. They feel they are entitled to what they have, and hard cheese if you were born into the servant class, but that's the way it goes.


Normally, I think of myself as a fence-sitter between the two groups, usually falling on the side of the progressives due to a tendency to feel empathy and to acknowledge the relativity of moral truths. Conservatives are driven by their heads, thus they see human existence as a zero-sum equation where someone has to lose for you to win. For them everything is black or white, right or wrong. They regard fence-sitting-seers-of-grey with contempt.

Throughout the 8 years of the Bush-Cheney administration* we were treated to the monotone nattering drumbeat from ultra progressive partisans, ranting negatively about everything that "W" said or did. It was tiring but often laughable for the extremes that the Libs would go to find fault with the President.

Now the cons, apparently feeling that turnabout is fair play, are filling the blogosphere and airwaves with silly criticisms of everything Barack Obama has done since his inauguration. Examples abound:
He is blamed for the ineffectiveness of the economic stimulus package (which was started during Bush's term), he is blamed for not bringing the troops home, for supporting a surge in Afghanistan, and the record unemployment is clearly his fault - all accomplished in just 9 months in office!
Lately, the criticisms are even nastier. You would never know that the Christmas day Northwest underwear bomber failed to complete his mission if you listen to some Conservative commentators. They are falling all over themselves accusing Obama of crimes and misdemeanors, sins of omission, commission and admission.
It's laughable. They used to say of Bush "He kept us safe" because there were no successful repeats of the 911 terrorist attacks in the USA. But Obama has been criticised as weak because of recent reports of foiled plots. (Hello, Cheney himself testified that there were several foiled plots after 911.)

Cheney, Limbaugh, and others talk about the Christmas day incident as if the bomb had exploded. They say Obama doesn't care about the safety of Americans - Which is about as block headed as it gets.

Most Americans are not as worried about crazed terrorists as they are about getting ripped off by some identity thief or taxed to death by out-of-touch elite legislators.

The main thing for which Obama should be criticized is this abomination of legislation called health care reform. As a candidate, Obama promised transparency, but has been silent while his pals in congress concocted this monstrosity of a reform bill behind closed doors. Candidate Obama pledged not to sign any legislation with earmarks, ("...we can no longer accept an earmarks process in which many of the projects being funded fail to address the real needs of our country.") Yet, nothing has changed. Deals were made in exchange for votes. Obama has has failed in his promise to us on these most important issues.

Already, two prominent Dems in the senate, seeing the tide of public opinion swelling against them, have already said that they will not run (and probably lose) in the next term.

Times they are a-changin'






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*I admit that I voted for George W. Bush both times. I'm still convinced that he was better than the opposition: 2000 Al Gore then 2004 Kerry for chrissakes. I've never liked Cheney; he always impressed me as the type of guy who would shoot you in the face after a couple of schnapps.

New Years Resolutions 2010

New Years resolutions are the tradition fodder for people who want to change something or accomplish some lofty goal. Studies* show that 75% of these resolutions become forgotten or abandoned within the first month. Virtually all resolutions fall by the wayside before 3 months have passed. Yet, being creatures of hope, people continue to dutifully write lists and consciously try to apply that self-discipline which is needed to reach the goal.

Generally my requisite resolutions repeat themselves from year to year: Travel more, write more, read good books, exercise and lose a few pounds, be nicer to telemarketers...and so on. In the past, these aspirations have evaporated like cat puke on a rug - within a few weeks.

But this year is different. This year, I did not make ANY resolutions. Thus I will not have to experience that gnawing sense of failure that most of you will feel as February draws to a close, and March rages like a lion, mocking your lack of productivity and weight loss. By April, you are slamming the phone down on telemarketers and beginning to hate that stack of unread books. Travel? Hah, June blows in like a lamb - and you have not even begun to plan that Cape vacation...

Not me, amigos. This year, instead of making resolutions we are making plans. We have already booked our getaway vacations for February in Florida and August on the Cape. Doubtless, by February I will be boasting that I am writing more, getting paid, losing weight, paying more attention to investments, reading good books, and learning a foreign language. By March, the taxes will be done, we will have trained the kitten NOT to jump on the counter and eat my eggs while I am taking a phone call. In June I will be counting my lottery winnings (and perhaps giving gift$ to my fans). By November we will be sending picture postcards back from Amalfi.

Yes, this is the year for accomplishment --- I can taste it like a 12 year old single malt scotch.


*The "Studies" I cite are - like most blog data - fictitious, fabricated to lend credence to specious factoids. (Papa always said never let the facts get in the way of a good story.)

Looking Forward to Another Fearful Decade

So here we are, witnessing the last few dessicated days of this decade drop one-by-one like leaves swirling into the storm drain of history.

One cannot help but compare our current media-stoked fears of melting ice caps and rising sea levels to the sense of trepidation (and in some cases - panic) that characterized the waning moments of the last decade.

Y2K
If you were working in IT and you were working for a company that had been around for more than five years, you were in some way involved with the desperate race to convert your legacy COBOL based Mainframe scatter-base business systems to the infinitely more complicated world of Client-Server, enterprise-wide, shared database environments. Nearly everyone was convinced that because some computer programs carried only the last two digits of the year, this would cause the entire infrastructure to a halt. Planes would fall out of the sky, elevators would get stuck between floors, automobiles wouldn't start.

It seems kind of silly now; nothing bad happened when the century did finally roll. Yet the fear that was generated by gurus and pundits caused businesses to spend trillions of dollars changing their perfectly adequate systems. Do you think the lack of reported disasters was the justification for all the remedial activity? Was there a monetary incentive for software companies and consultants to promote the fear of doing nothing?

Deja Vu?
One cannot help but see a similarity in the current Global Warming controversy. I say controversy because not everyone agrees that humans are substantially affecting climate change. Heck legitimate scientists even disagree on whether the temps are warming or cooling. But, which ever side you are on, you cannot help noticing that the dire warnings echo the fearmongering of the Y2K crisis. Most of us non-scientists find it easier to go with the consensus opinion. But we should remember that historically, consensus in scientific thought has generally been proven incorrect by the accumulation of more information. The data upon which the current global warming fears are based cannot be verified. Not very scientific, if you ask me. Again, we can see a monetary gain for industries that will benefit from selling green stuff. I am not suggesting that our energy policy is for sale. That would be cynical.

Y2K was not the only impending disaster of the millennium. Ten years ago, we were worried that the cloning of a sheep named Dolly would lead to Frankenstinian experiments and armies of warrior human clones, body part farming and a global market in spare body parts. No one wanted to eat genetically engineered corn, nor even steaks from cows that had been fed such scary food. Remember the Mad Cow disease panic? It ruined the US beef export market for years.

In 1999 we were worried about the war in Kosovo, we worried about the flare-up between nuclear powers India vs Pakistan. We worried that the Columbine massacre would spark more copycat mass shooters among Gen-Y malcontents. We were worried about WMD's in Saddam Hussein's arsenal. Most of these fears fizzled early in the new decade.

What Really Happened.
Who among us anticipated the debacle of the 2000 presidential election? The world watched while we learned about hanging chads in a ballot count dispute that raised the spectre of third-world style election fraud in Florida and other states. And, we were shocked and awed by the September 11, 2001 attacks in New York and Washington DC. This was followed by paralyzing terror in the form of Anthrax in the mail, and sniper attacks in DC/Virginia area. The war on terror drew into a long and costly occupation which has yet to end. Images of Katrina victims stranded on roofs in New Orleans compete with pictures of hundreds of homes destroyed by fires in LA. Oh, I almost forgot the near total collapse of the economy that virtually wiped-out half of our retirement nesteggs, sent millions of Americans to the unemployment line and worst of all - destroyed our faith in the integrity of the fat cats and politicians who run and oversee the system.

The summary point here: just about everything we were worried about in 1999 turned out OK and the real disasters were unforseen. Let us assume that the next decade will bring more surprises - that is indeed scary.

Have a predictable New Year!

Christmas 2009

No pony again this year.

Tis the Season.... to be Famous

In today's Globe, columnist Ellen Goodman writes an op-ed piece entitled "Whatever Happened to Shame?" which echoed my own musings in yesterday's blog. Goodman writes that anthropologists say that "shame comes from a violation of cultural norms". She goes on to cite several cases to demonstrate that the cultural norms seem to be shifting towards acceptance of the antics of the rich, famous and wannabees. Examples include the mistress (and rat) of Gov Spitzer has just landed a job as an advice columnist at The NY Post.
"Now they have hired the hooker to be an advice columnist. This is like hiring Bernie Madoff as a personal finance columnist." She also cites the cynical attitude of fat cat bankers who seem to have no sense of embarrassment when details of their greed are reported.

There was a story last week about Bernie Madoff in "prison" (his door is not even locked) where he is regarded by other felons as the "Godfather". Tiger Woods alleged girlfriends are showing up in droves, each eager for her 15 minutes of attention. Pols caught on camera taking bribes get re-elected. They justify their behavior declaring that everyone does it. Fame trumps shame. It's just part of the evolution (or is it devolution?) of cultural norms.

Collectively, we have accepted the premise that famous people can get away with stuff that would have embarrassed most of us, if our mothers had found out.

Heck, Nowadays, Mom proudly shows her tattoos for anyone at the mall to ogle while she is loudly talking on her cell phone ignoring her bratty kids who will, undoubtedly, grow-up to be shameless bratty adults.

'Tis the Season to be Greedy

Fa-la-la-la-lah La-la-la-lah.


I'm getting worried. Shame, the traditional weapon against corruption and abuse has been rendered ineffective - or so it seems to this wizened observer of the American scene.

While most of us are still tightening the old fiscal belt, bank executives, Wall Street fat cats, college presidents and politicians are unabashedly gorging themselves in a feast of excess.

In the news yesterday, the costs of congressional travel to conference in Scotland.  Our elected reps and spouses spent 5 days at a "conference", and spent taxpayer money like water from a firehose. 

Banks, Wall Street, GM are paying back billions in TARP money so they can continue to pay exorbitant bonuses to themeselves and cronies. They say the top execs are irreplacable but anyone who has worked in a successful company knows this is not true. No one is indespensible. And most of the important work is not done in Mahogany Row.   Besides that, most of the guys looking for bonuses were calling the shots when the economy tanked.  Aren't bonuses supposed to be a reward for success?

In his 2002 book Throwing the Elephant Stanley Bing presents a zen approach to managing the boss (the elephant). This observation (p172) is dead-on:

"Unlike you, the great elephants do not concern themselves with personal feelings because they have taught themselves to view the vast range of human interactions as 'just business', nothing more, and this distance gives them incalculable power."

So there you have it. The main reason execs have the perks is because they are a) smart and most importantly b) are not burdened by conscience.    Relieved of a sense of shame for their actions, there is no reason not to continue to claw and grab any money on the table because everyone else is doing it too.  Tough darts for the vast unwashed.  It's just business saith the Godfather, nothing personal. 

The problem is, we  (who still feel shame even when we undertip a waitress because of  lousy service)  are becoming personally revolted by these excesses - especially when it is on our backs.   

The great philosopher Tom Leher  nailed it in his Christmas Carol: 
"On Christmas day you can't get sore
Your fellow man you must adore
There's time to rob him all the more
the other three hundred and sixty-four..." 

Endangered Species

Just a few hours before he was to give a speech the other night, Massachusetts governor, Deval Patrick cancelled a scheduled appearance at a local gathering of a men's club when he found out that women were excluded. Until this news item, I had never heard of The Clover Club either.

Today, the Boston Globe editorial praised Patrick for "Skipping boy's night out". The Globe thinks that it is evil for white males to get together to eat, drink and be merry.

On the other hand, the Globe thinks it is OK for women and "other minorities" to establish gender or even race-based clubs - because "there are substantial differences between a club that literally perpetuates an old-boy network and an organization formed to encourage networking among underrepresented groups." Really? Substantial differences?

The only difference I see is a double standard. Maybe the Globe needs to do a recount of who the minorities are these days. In 2009 English speaking white guys are out-numbered by "underrepresented groups."

I don't disagree with Gov Patrick making a personal statement about his participation at a club that excludes a selected group. What bothers me is the editorial assumption that people do not have the right to congregate with people who they feel most comfortable with - even if that means to exclude some groups of people. Secret societies, leagues, clubs, fraternities, associations, cults - Such groups have existed since men lived in caves.

It is clear that the government needs to intervene where "clubs" that are really fronts for criminal gangs, violence-preaching (eg, skinheads) or other illegal activity.
If the group is not conspiring to actively hurt nonmembers, leave them be.

These days, the government enforces a public policy of inclusion. Equal opportunity (ie, minority preference) is mandated at every level of federal, state and local organizations. Government and civil contracts, grants, job opportunities are all subject to affirmative action.

Family wise things have really changed. Women have (understandably) rebelled against their former role which primarily involved childcare, housewifery and provider of connubial bliss. Nowadays, the tables have turned.

Men long for the days when they were treated as kings of their castle, inscrutable Martians who were exempt from the hospital delivery room. Heck, they aren't even the principle breadwinners,anymore. Today, guys have to do everything women do: they are expected to come directly home after work instead of having a few pops at the local watering hole; in many cases they have to shop, cook, clean, watch the kids, etc. Most social engagements are still decided by women, friendships with other couples are dictated by females.
She "owns" all the rooms in the house; if he is good, she lets him have a corner where he can have a TV and a comfortable chair. She monitors his meals, drinks and wardrobe.

So what is wrong with a bunch of guys getting together a few times a year to smoke cigars, tell dirty jokes and have a few drinks.

It used to be The American Way.

Not H1N1

Not to worry. I probably have a common cold, according to a licensed health care professional with whom I have had recent intercourse. (No, not the Tiger Woods kind of intercourse - you people really need to get a dictionary).

Also this diagnosis did not come from my social network of self-appointed health experts (i.e., everyone with an opinion and an email account). They didn't need a stinking diagnosis to offer a cure: "Take antibiotics", "Gargle with salt water", "Bury a dead cat under an elm tree in the moonlight" they tell me. "Leeches", "Irish Whiskey", "Juice", "Seaweed" they shout.

Just a common cold: Tell that to my throat and sinuses; they obviously think that they are entitled to a more interesting diagnosis. But beyond coughing and sneezing there is No fever, no gastrointestinal problems (i.e., probably not the flu & not a bacterial infection).

The Irish whiskey cure seems like it would be worth a shot, I argue. There might be some basis in medicine. After all the alcohol kills bacteria, right? Then Reality pours cold water on that track. A cold is caused by a virus, not a bacteria. Still, the nurse distinctly said to "Drink lots of fluids." My wife - who does not have a medical degree - insists that the nurse meant water-based fluids. I argue that whiskey is 80% water.

This is just another instance of a situation where everyone thinks they know what you should do.

But, in fact, no one knows really knows anything for certain. The Internet is full of conflicting information. One expert says to use hand sanitizers to kill cold and flu germs. Another expert says that rhino virus (common cold) thrives on alcohol! Some experts say wash your hands with hot soapy water long enough to sing "Happy Birthday" Another news item says it doesn't matter if the water is hot. To kill germs you need water to be boiling hot.

Anyway, thanks for all your get well cards and letters - and well-intended advice, however wrong and misguided.

Cough cough

Looks like I am in the grip of one of the many animal flu's that are "going around". Not bad enough to go to Dr., but bad enough to make me miss the Thanksgiving gathering at my daughter's on Thursday.

In the old days, I'd have just taken a cough suppressant dutifully arrived and mingled with the other unsuspecting guests, spreading deadly pathogens with every handshake and hug. Nowadays, with heightened awareness, I felt nobler by staying home in self imposed quarantine, mollifying myself by watching Football on TV. (I think it is the first time I have missed T-day in my adult life.) Will other family members appreciate my selflessness or will they think of me as a wimp?

My wife was feeling fine on Thursday morning and went without me (she was bringing the stuffing, turkey gravy and of course a cake) and she had a nice time. She brought me home a nice plate of turkey and fixin's. They say "feed a fever", right? Or is it the other way round? Anyway, I did get my dinner, reheated in the microwave, though I missed the warmth of family and friends.

My sense that I was contagious was justified when, alas, yesterday evening - after a full day of mandatory post-Thanksgiving-Day-frenzy-shopping - my wife began coughing and sneezing. Today, she is feeling the way I felt on Thursday, and is staying in bed to rest. I feel a bit better today. Hopefully, I am on-the-mend after 4 days of malaise, so now I can make* chicken soup for her.

[*open can, pour in pan, heat and serve]

Time to End Legal Dishonesty

Except for the cost, I don't have any complaints about my health insurance. So "reform" is a misnomer. Instead of actually improving things for all citizens, the current health care bill should be called "Situation Normal - Fouled-up and Getting Worse."

Instead of creating more complex monster laws, lawmakers ought to be figuring-out how to make life more simple, more fair and to protect us from getting ripped-off.

If these guys want to reform something, how about the IRS? The tax laws are too complex for an ordinary citizen to comprehend and yet there are loopholes through which high-priced tax accountants can drive a luxury yacht.

How about truth in pricing? For some reason, the Law thinks it is OK for companies to lie about the actual cost of their products.

• Banks. We have been conditioned to accept the phony and usurious mortgage rate calculation formula which loads all the interest into the front of the loan. No peeps you aren't paying 6% on your mortgage. Over 30 years you actually pay more than 200% (do the math: if you borrow $100,000, you pay back $215,838!)
• Credit Card Companies. They promise you great deals, cash back schemes, cash advances and low rates to seduce you and then charge you exorbitant late fees and raise your interest rate to impossible limits.
• The travel industry is another big offender. They lie to you about the price of an airline ticket, omitting taxes, surcharges and fees - which can add-up to a significant delta between advertised price and net amount. Rental car costs are almost humorous when you tick off the multiple exceptions to the advertised price (airport fees, recovery fees, usage surtax, local taxes, and on and on).
• Telephone companies. Are permitted by law to send you an incomprehensible bill, which no person can reasonably be expected to understand. The buried fees and charges boggle the mind in their variety and silliness.
• Utility Bills. Ditto.

So, my point is, maybe our elected representatives would serve us better if they protected us from some of these daily assaults on our net worth. I am not asking the government to control prices, mind you; all I am demanding is honesty.

Here are a few changes I would make if I were the Emperor:

• Eliminate fine print. The text of all contracts, ads and legal documents would be in 12 point normal Ariel font.
• Plain English. All commercial and legal documents must be composed using language that a high school graduate can understand.
• Fees or surcharges will be illegal; all costs must be included in the advertised price of all products and services. Handling charges will be illegal. Shipping charges must reflect the actual cost to ship the item.
• Applicable Taxes must be clearly stated in every ad. The final net price must be prominently displayed.
• Credit card fraud and ID theft will be punished severely. Full restitution to victims will be required by the perpetrators by liquidating all assets.
• Political ads would be forbidden. This eliminates the need for political contributions. Elections will be based on Facebook Profiles. Lobbyists would be hanged if they refused to get real jobs.
• Class action suits would be illegal; civil negligence awards would be capped at projected cost of necessary medical care and actual property damages.
• Rebates, cash back, and other phony gimmicks would be banned.
• Companies that produce pop-up ads will be fined heavily.

This would be just for starters.

The End of the Era is Near

The recent announcement by A.G. Eric Holder to bring the Sept 11 terrorists to civilian trial in NYC is astounding -- not only because it defies common sense, but also because if anything goes wrong, the shit will fly directly on President Obama.

By anything going wrong, I mean: Acquittal, more terrorist attacks, revealing damaging information which compromises US intelligence activities, lengthy PR appearances by defendants, and obligatory media circus. In other words, there is almost zero chance that at the end, reasonable people will say, "Ah, justice was served."

The more credible result is that the majority of the American voting public will conclude that Mr. Obama has terrible judgement. They will recall the bad fellas that he associated with in the past, and the poor choices he has made in appointing Holder and Geitner, not to mention the choice of Biden as VP. Despite having a filibuster proof congress He has failed to accomplish any of his major campaign promises, and this monstrosity of a health care reform bill will be remembered - if it gets passed - as the worst piece of lawmaking since prohibition.

Thus, I am predicting the end of the Obama era, starting with the terrorist trial. The Republicans will sweep in the legislature next year, by promising to undo the bloated health care reform bill, and Obama will be back in Chicago looking for a new house in 2012. The slogan for the election: "Obama Lied; Hope Died."

You heard it here first.